any day now, i'll be thin.

the world's gone mad. or at least i have.

before we get to that, here's the plan.

my mother's staying home sometime before new year's, at which point, she will pick up the treadmill. it's been a long time coming, in my opinion. hopefully, i actually get it this time. seriously. so then, after i get the treadmill, BEFORE new year's day (remember that, it's important), i spend some time with it. figure out how i'll fit it into my schedule. because on new year's day, i start the abc. brilliant, really, because 50 days into the new year will be two days before my birthday. hopefully i can do like, one hour on the treadmill in the morning and one hour on the treadmill at night. (inspired by my wonderfully thin aunt who's probably against sending my grandmother to costa rica.)

and of course i'll stick to it, because that's my birthday present to myself.

i told my mom she didn't need to get me anything for christmas because i only wanted a treadmill. and this morning i made her breakfast. just being nice to make sure she'll go through with it.

i managed to cancel the shindig at my place, thankfully. i don't want to have people eating in my house when i'm trying not to.

and now for the main part.

yesterday, all i had was tea until about 8pm. but oh, the hash browny goodness. i think i drooled on myself when i smelled them. (not really.) and then it happened. so yeah. it was like...

to add insult to injury, i asked my mom how many hash browns she wanted this morning for breakfast and she said one. MY MOTHER HAS BETTER SELF CONTROL THAN ME. [insert button smashing here, with a hint of self-directed anger.] that's shameful.

that being said, i can't wait until i get that treadmill.

.....

any day now.

oh yeah. and i was watching "superskinny me" which, to be completely honest, went completely against the purpose of the film. if anything, it got me excited. very excited. man, when i saw louise on the treadmill and then slipping into those size double zero jeans. i was like, awww yeah. burning calories. of course, when i saw kate.....well, it wasn't as inspiring. not in the same way. just goes to show you, if you stick to it, you'll see progress. seriously, though, it was a five week experiment (or something like that.) and louise was amazing.

but yeahhh, that's not what it was for. whatever. i still like it.

now i think i'm going to.... go back to sleep. i feel all yawny and stuffs.

honestly.