pop goes the weasel.

today was great.

i saw puck, which is probably why today was great. we had awkward small talk. it wasn't awkward for him, only for me i think. i beat around the bush a lot. and then he said he wanted to go home to get lunch because he hadn't had breakfast. then i opened my arms, and i got this... kind of okay hug. naturally, after that, i asked, so when do i get my special hug? you got it yesterday, he replied, slightly confused. i think you should give me a better hug for that A-, sir. the last two hugs were shit. that's because you weren't really into it. you know what? he was right. how wonderfully observant of you, is what i wanted to say. but i had nothing to say to that. so i said nothing. i know this is going to sound really pathetic, but i've felt so massive lately. so i can't give him the same hugs i gave him before i felt as massive as i do right now. before, i didn't mind pressing myself into his arms and letting him pull me in close. but now it's like, GAH. i don't want him to think i'm fat. or that is, i don't want him to realize how big i am. he began walking to his car. just after he vanished from my view, i ran in his direction. yelled. puck! (or whatever his real name is.) i know what i want! i want to play hide and seek! okay, he grinned mischievous as hell. you go hide, and i'll give you a five minute head start. ready? five... four... while he's counting down, he's opening his car door and putting his bag inside. i stomp angrily. like a demented five year old. you're gonna get in your car and drive off! c'mon, i really wanna play. he just smiles. but look, i'm already in my car. not all of you, i say, pointing at his foot, still on the ground. he puts both feet in. tomorrow. basement. ten-forty. i'm not gonna be there, i've got homework to do. ten forty. seriously!  ten forty. basement. wednesday, april thirtieth, two thousand fourteen. be there. i growl, good bye, puck.

and then i see crush # 3, who we'll just call shaggy. and i make sure puck sees me walking away while talking to shaggy. but once i'm back inside the school building, i abandon shaggy to go help my friend, tabby with her paper. apparently i'm good at editing papers. (shocking, isn't it? especially considering the fact that i can't even start my sentences with capital letters.) she doesn't finish, so we both go to class and agree to meet up again later.

later, i come to where we're supposed to meet up and i see crush # 4, the super tall one. let's call him tesla, because he's absolutely brilliant. (and also, tesla was wickedly attractive.) i saw him around all day today, actually. the first time i saw him today, he was looking right over my head as i said, hey! hey! and then he finally looked down and saw me. fortunately, this time, when i said hi, he saw me, smiled and said hi. i've seen you all day today. what's up with that? don't you have a home to get to? he laughed. where ya headed? said he was going to get lunch. asked what i was up to. just going to help a friend with a paper. and doing a crossword puzzle. he smiled. then this girl i know came over and they said hi to each other, and she said hi to me. and he was like, "you two know each other?" apparently, i know everyone. and then tabby shows up, and stands near us. the girl looks at tabby's  nails and goes, "oh my gosh, your nails are amazing!" and they start talking about how they need to do their nails and blahblahblah. and while they're talking, i look at my nails and i show them to tesla. and then he looks at his nails and he shows them to me, and we laugh together, because they're unpolished. it was nice. i took his commonplace book at one point, and said, may i? he said go ahead. i figure most girls would do something like write their name and number. but i just wrote an extra item on his to do list. (it said, remember to smile! because he's always studying and he tends to grimace on occasion.) then he leaves. the girl leaves. tabby and i go to work on her paper.

icing on the proverbial cake? after yesterday's fiasco, i wasn't looking forward to seeing that stupid girl or her guy today. so of course, i see in the study area, that stupid girl. and she's getting help with something from shaggy. i give tabby a brief rundown of what happened yesterday. and she gets super protective of me. she turns to shaggy, and stupid girl-- she mistakenly thought he was the idiot from yesterday, but he wasn't-- and she says, in this absolutely no-nonsense voice, "HEY. we don't want any shit, okay? we're here to work. so don't start any shit." shaggy, who's totally confused and looks really adorable (and slightly scared), tries to ask what's going on. she doesn't even let him talk. she goes, "HEY. no shit. we're here to work." and then it's really quiet and awkward while i tell her that shaggy is innocent. she apologizes to him. but stupid girl? of course not. so she leaves when she's done, and she doesn't give us any shit.

thinking about it still makes me smile.

today was strange and beautiful.

honestly.