trolls, elves and fairies.

my life never ceases to confuse and amaze me. it's been a while, yeah.

about two weeks after school started, i started hanging out with someone i'd known for a while, but never really talked to. i don't even know what kind of nickname i'd give her. the only thing i can say fits is water bear, because she's the toughest person i know. and the water bear is a bad ass little creature. we've spent most of our days every week since the first time we hung out... hanging out. some nights i crash on her couch (either because we're both too high to function or because we're just sleepy), some weekends she comes and sleeps over at my house. the funny thing is, none of this would have happened if we hadn't hung out the first time. she took me to a store where we (somehow) kept getting into conversations about psychological issues. (do you see where this is headed? i hope you do.) turns out she's recovered from an eating disorder. in a manner of speaking. at any rate, it's nice being able to eat packets of mustard with someone who, while realizing it's totally abnormal, thinks it's perfectly fine. the only problem is that she isn't totally comfortable eating around people, so knowing i have food issues makes her that much more uncomfortable eating around me. so usually we have to go our separate ways so she can stick to her schedule and do what normal people do a few times a day. it's funny, she slept over last weekend and i bought a box of cheerios for us to eat for breakfast. it wasn't until about four p.m. that she said, "so, do you want to eat those cheerios now?" (because i totally forgot about breakfast and lunch) and then she told me to pour it for both of us. probably because it was my house and all.

she didn't mean to fuck with my head, i know. but it did. how do you figure out how much food to give someone when you can barely figure that out for yourself? it was awkward, but i did it. we ate together (kind of) so i think we're making progress. oddly enough, though, we'll soon be exercising together. i like that, though. did i mention she's strong enough to give her 200-lb boyfriend piggy back rides? she's like a giant muscle. should be fun.

on another, less eating disorder related note, my mother got rid of my dog. came home one day and found out he was in an adoption shelter an hour away. so... that's something, there. and i got all of the eight piercings i wanted at once, because i was feeling impulsive and indestructible. didn't flinch once. three lobes on both sides, one auricle and a helix on the left. asymmetrical. just like i like things. (the woman who pierced me said i had the most she's ever done at once. the record breaker. that's me.) and i've been doing my homework. in most of my classes.

i haven't actually had time until now to sit down and actually think about all that's been happening. it's odd. not sure if i like it or not. but it is what it is.

anyway, just wanted to say, "hey! i'm okay!" relatively speaking. i hope you've been okay too.

i missed it here, with all of you silly, beautiful people.

can't say i'll be able to post often, because as honest as water bear and i are with each other, i still don't think i'd tell her about my blog. maybe. it isn't like she doesn't know, so it wouldn't change anything, but at the same time, she doesn't need to. you know? hurrr. we'll see. 

as to the trolls, elves and fairies, it's the name of my newest coloring book. (it's really pretty.) it never gets old. and neither do i, mentally. plus it just seemed like a better title than 'whales and dolphins'.



Englishrose said...

thankyou for coming back
seems like she really helps you
i hope things go well for you andd
jel about that book
sounds amazing :')
much love

Rowan [previously Bones] said...

Hey. It's good to hear from you. I am glad you've found a friend you're really comfortable with.

Thank you for the lovely comment.


Rayya said...

I had to google waterbear - and wow they are completely badass effing creatures!
now you can make me laugh (as you always do) and cheer my world up (like you do whenever I read anything you write) and I am so glad you popped by to tell us you are ok.. wow 8 piercings - at once. :| You seem to be turning into something of a water bear your self! She seems amaze.. I am so glad you have met her but I hope you two can look after eachother and well done for just being you in general - cos youre amazing :D and

she did what with your dog?!
Why. Would. She. Do. That.


I hope you are ok.. (you seem to be)

Love you loads! no matter how long you go for - just know that x

Depressed Skinny Mess. said...

so glad you're back! And its fantastic you've found a truly wonderful friend to make you happy :) xx

ꜛⱴאּ Sⱥm ŁupiƝ ҂ said...

water bear. how does that even
is everyone you know recovered from an eating disorder
Cheerios is a hot piece of food.
a giant muscle LOL
i just realised how hot your background is.
its hot.
what the hell is your Mother
and ughhh piercings hot!
in most of my classes.
...NOT AGAIN. what did i tell you about not doing homework and procrastinating
you know what should be a title
i like Sam's butt
that is the best effin title ever.

-Sam Lupin

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