1.12.2014

climbing climbing climbing never falling.

my friend is getting married. and i'm freaking out.

she's checking out these really cute indian dresses (emphasis on cute) for the bridesmaids, and i'm her maid of honor. so i think the order of importance for people in the wedding ceremony is as follows: bride, groom, parents, bridesmaids, grooms...boys. or whatever. with maid of honor in between parents and bridesmaids, and best man in between bridesmaids and grooms....monkeys. i get the feeling i'll look lumpy in anything she tries to pick. yes, lumpy. who wants a lumpy maid of honor? i'll tell you. no one. these memories are forever.

plus, pictures are permanent. it's one of few times i have no excuse for avoiding pictures. and i hate pictures.

the bad news is that currently, to the extent of my knowledge, i'd be the only bridesmaid without a date. the good news is that currently, to the extent of my knowledge, there's no [ +1] situation happening. which is great. really, i'm touched. no dates for anyone. yay.

on a less self-centered note, she's going to make a really pretty bide.and if any of the dresses she just showed me looked half as amazing on those hideous models, then it'll look absolutely breathtaking on her. (just kidding though, i've never seen an ugly indian model.) her husband to be is decently attractive as well. he looks like a less handsome version of aladdin, although still respectable in a non-animated way. and if the pictures of their immediate families say anything about the gene pool these kids are swimming in, their distant relatives are going to be gorgeous.

can you say duck duck goose? except in this case, i guess the bridesmaids' game would be swan swan ugly duckling. except at the end of the story, the ugly duckling really turns out to be a goose.

good news. i have five months to stop looking like the imprint of a converse sneaker in a pile of elephant scat. and bad news... school starts in two days. and i have this stupid conference this weekend, where i'll be staying in this hotel room with girls i only get along with because we never see each other. why didn't they just decide to lock starving wolves in a room together? it would end better.

wait, i need to stay positive. in two days, i get to see crush # 4 again. maybe. and i've been watching hey arnold, so i'm fully ready to display my undying affection in a completely emotionally unstable way. also, i've got a conference this weekend, which means i get a holiday from my mother and cat. although, to be honest, i'll kind of miss the cat.

i feel kind of bad that as much as i'm excited for her, i'm twice as terrified that i'll be wearing the same dress as other people. that's just terrible. and i'm also horrified about the fact that these pictures will be on facebook. i haven't been on that site in... i guess a year now. and i know i'll be tormented by the possibility of pictures up for public display. i'm being haunted by them now, and they don't even exist yet. the wedding's going to be beautiful. as for me? that's a big question mark. (it doesn't help that my sister just came home after a week of not being here, wearing tighter pants and looking skinnier than ever.)

this is bad. and i've been sitting in this body for months now. and it's not good enough. something must be done. i need a plan.

or, in case of an emergency, a ticket out of the country.

honestly.

4 comments:

Jax said...

Oh my gosh that is so so so exciting!!!! Maid of Honor is going to be so much fun, even if the dress situation is a bit stressful. Indian weddings are supposed to be really fun, I've always wanted to get an invite. This is such a positive goal to work towards, I'm really excited for you.

And I'm sure you don't look like a converse print, I'm sure you look lovely. Good luck with the girls, and try not to stress toooo much about the impending doom of classes. I'm trying not to freak about them, too.

Jax

Sam Lupin said...

honey, when you start this post, it should be "my friend is getting married. i'm going to dig out his grave for him because good luck, buddy."
xD perhaps, that's just in my religion considering everyone's doomed to marry their cousins anyway
nothing is forever, m'dear. and you're probably not a lumpy bridesmaid! shhhhhh
"good news. i have five months to stop looking like the imprint of a converse sneaker in a pile of elephant scat." i laughed my fucking ass off. darling, you probably do not look like that. shh.
your sister. ugh. i'd punch her in the face rlly
"or, in case of an emergency, a ticket out of the country." omg. come here.

-Sam Lupin
PS. love you, <3

ascendancy. said...

Oh my goodness. There is no way you will be a lumpy MOH. You are going to be a hotty toddy!! 5 months... You've got time to get mentally ready and feel great. Pictures can be nerve wracking... but you've got this. I'm here for you when you need support.

Even at my lowest weights I ALWAYS wear spanx to events. Especially with dresses that are tight or satin. Smooths everything out and makes you curve in all the right places. Also... BIG hair. Always big hair.

Yay for seeing crush #4! And hey arnold is boss. Cartoons were so good when I was a kid. What the hell happened? Am I the only one watching rugrats reruns??.... How about you take that ticket to my house and we will watch the Rugrats movie :))

Much love girlie. Happy Monday <3

x

ViralTikTok said...

You look and are wonderful... Always...

Get pumped for this semester, it's a new one, and that means a better one.

2014 is a new wonderful year.

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