to my best friend.

hey lee.

how's tricks? what's been going on lately? we don't talk as much as we used to. and now our conversations are totally superficial. i'm glad we're exercising together, and mainly that you're being healthier about it than me. but anyway.

thanks for being there when shit hit the fan. and although you never had any really good things to say (no offense), i appreciate you being there. i mean, you said something good. like once. when i had a crush on josh? you said something like "that guy's a complete loser and he knows it." turns out you were only half right. i don't think he realizes or knows.

i know i'm i think i wanted to tell you this for a while, but didn't know how to. i'm tired of you treating me like a kid. i know i'm two years younger than you, but sometimes it feels like i'm ten years younger. which is good, in a way. and horrible in several others. maybe you're just ridiculously mature. actually, now that i think about it, you really are. how did we end up best friends anyway? i only talked to you  i barely talked to you in school, and when we did talk, you were with your other friends. the ones who always seemed to know where they were going in life and were too good for people who were less than perfect. you know who i'm talking about. well, you would if you read this. but anywho.

i know you don't think i can do this. but damn, i know i can, lee. so just, keep it on the hush hush. (you should really stop saying that by the way.)

honestly.